I got my period while he was fingering me , I knew it because I never get that wet.
Did u at least say sorry?
i woke up next to the toilet with a chipped tooth, somebody elses shirt on, and a random guys id in my pocket
Dont even try and act like it wasn't you who made the sex tape of my dogs.
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
It's so cute when the exchange student uses "blowjob" as a verb.
He told me that I smelled like a Glade Plug-in, then sang the Menard's jingle in it's entirety in between kissing me.
You put your shot glass in your waistband and then told me how convinent it was.
Just peed in a urinal with another girl. It's that kind of night.
I had a dream where I was about to fight you but you were dressed like a greek god and had just killed a werewolf with your bare hands
although steph and I had 3 bottles of wine by that point and watched an opera that featured a black dildo so anything was possible really
I was thirsty after the sex and it was a long trek back to res so naturally I stole chocolate milk from his fridge as I left
No I don't. You owe me sex and cinnamon rolls.
Should I wish him a happy birthday?
Well he has been inside of you enough times that you probably should.
I am in the parking lot of CVS in Auburn. I think a truck full of Plan B and regret just arrived.
Crazy homeless man drinking beer out of a vitamin water container on the bus just set me up on a date with the yuppie next to him
Randomize
