Does puking on your bio final mean I can retake it?
I won't be sarcastic... just naked
In case you were wondering, my scare crow is wearing your outfit from last night.
nothing like a tattoo of a large eagle attacking a small eagle whos attacking a shark to bond to siblings together for life
I woke up tied to the door handle with reindeer patterned socks. You can tell it's Christmas.
at least if we puke, we will be surrounded by beautiful, non-judgemental trees.
There's always one sober annoying person at a party. I hate responsible people. I just wanted to show everyone my nipples. There cute. She didn't have to stop me
I woke up in my living room, on the floor, wearing nothing but a fur coat?
You know what, don't say anything. You all made fun on me for saying I would fuck him junior year when he taught us algebra and six years later, HERE I AM.
i keep seeing little orange spots im starting to freak out
you tried mixing adderall in your visine last night..
Just had hot animal sex with the guy who had been sending me 10 second selfie snapchats for the past month
Some girl came up to us crying that she lost her phone and you said "if it's meant to be, let it be"
Ive done some fucked up shit, but last night was the first I have Poured milk on anothers mans face in the shower.
My stuff that was at your place last night smells like doughnuts. I'm not even mad.
Will you remind me I changed my hotspot phone password to fuckyouprivilegedwhitedude
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