i keep myself tagged when other girls look bad/ugly so i look better
just ask for directions from a guy with a penis drawn on his window
Watched a women out our tannin salon literally fight police because she was getting arrested for trying to drunkenly fight the tanning salon owner...we need to step up our day drinking this is shameful.
I have Retrograde Ejaculation as a side effect from one of my meds. Is this a respectable form of birth control?
Blonde girl lying face-down, passed out next to my bed, walls are covered in guacamole. College is looking excellent.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to iphone keyboard type "roflcopter" when intoxicated?
At no time is it ever okay for my doctor to compliment my tattoos, when giving me a physical exam.......
Meant to have fun, ended up giving speech about consent to guy at bar. Feminist side feels happy. Orgasms side feels confused and betrayed.
Using all my books as packing buffer for my liquor bottles. And you said being an English major was worthless.
He has an accent when he types. I can *hear* the schnitzel. Especially when he's drunk.
Then he unzipped his pants and whispers, " oohhh, look out!"
My cat is staring at me while I drink my wine on the bathroom floor in the morning instead of attending class. Sorry mom and dad. Sorry cat.
finals do horrible things to a person. i haven't worn pants since friday
All I did today was eat pizza and use my vibrator.
ya figured it'd be nice to explore the mythical world of sober sex i've heard so much about
i've often wondered how it works
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