My moms helping me unpack but im getting a little nervous because I dont remember where i put my dildo
I think im definitely allergic to shell fish. Or hungover. Probably both.
I think being an adult is being able to say no to free shots...I need to work on that.
The Vegas crew is in two groups, Team Vodka and Team Fireball. There is no winner in this.
well I think it'll pretty much be gone by Saturday. On a scale of 1- Snooki's unborn child how much do periods freak you out?
more embarrassing than that time i showed up to class in my hoodie and leggings because i over slept, and then as i zipped my hoodie down i realized i didn't sleep with a bra on or a shirt
after the shots you kept on yelling "this is for the dreamers"
Wellp yesterday was spent absurdly hungover and today was spent in planned parenthood so I hope that's not an indication of the year to come
for some reason leaving your socks onmakes it less meaningful.
We just had can't-look-you-in-the-eye sex and it was still surprisingly good
I'm just to the point my give a fucks is so far in the red that I'm going to have to take out a 30yr loan of fucks to repay it
Double-fisting ice cream and wine. Do not send help.
You spilled your drink, and we laughed so hard my boobs popped out of my shirt.
Jack said he hasn't jerked off in like two weeks and he's like a smoldering volcano who wants to bury you like Pompeii with his man gravy
My favourite part was when you contorted upside down in the tub and said "I don't want to be upside down"
Randomize
