will power is for people who don't want to get laid
I told her I had to go to work this morning, got fully dressed in a suit, walked her out, drove around the block, parked, and walked right back in my apt and went back to sleep..
Vibrator and massage oils got stopped at security. Super.
she asked if mt Rushmore was natural or man made
she was giving me head and that cheryl crow 'youre favorite mistake' song came on. she looks up and all i could do was nod
Don't blame the cocaine for your eating disorder.
Just had lapdance from stripper that had her 5th kid 28 hours earlier. A for work ethic.
So my dad just walked in on me with the same girl twice in 3 nights. I told him if he wants to see her tits to adleast admit it. All he did was smirk.
So, I'm stoned at his house petting the neighbors cat I made him steal.
You're a fucking train wreck.
Yknow what, if there is a thug life for white bitches, I'm living it. I went out on a date, watched howls moving castle with my brother till he passed out, then went and got some a+ dick, and made it home in time to take my mom to work. Now its 7am, I'm in bed with some free tacos, and when I'm done eating I'm going to sleep. What a great night.
On another note, I feel like my vagina is slowly being peeled off with a rusty potato peeler.
Just told my shrink " this was a year for whoring around"
I wore heels to a golf store in hopes of getting laid. I've hit a new all time low.
Sorry for pissing on y'all's floor last night
i need some magic done to my vagina
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