There was an extended period of my adolescent life where my friends and I would get high, drive around in my minivan listening exclusively to the wu tang clan, and intentionally crash into snowbanks
I can’t believe the potential orgy I left behind at Waffle House.
Me liking this guy is the best diet ever. Do I want this cookie...or do I want to get laid.
Let's just say for some reason we thought it was okay to make a burrito smoothie.
So basically i got outta bed and started peeing on the a/c unit..when my roommate tried to stop me i looked at him and said "i got this"
just cheers'ed a flock of cattle as i drove past eating a burger i bought 7 hours ago. that high.
I was at a bus stop, eating a load of bread. Fairly sure I'm the poster child for poor students.
IM FEEDING MY CAT ALL THE HAM
Hi I haven't talked to you since you bought legal marijuana-are you still stoned?
He's all enlightened and liberal. My next beefcake will be much more Neanderthal.
My dad just said "fuck circus"
You're such a good friend. You send me pictures of your boobs when I'm sad. I will always appreciate that.
pls come over. need ride to hospital once taquitos are ready
There is a high pitched squealing noise coming from somewhere in my house. I hope it's a gas leak cause I'm over this week man.
I mean I've only met the girl once and she was trying to slit some guys tires.
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