Yea and his cousin visited from central and i fucked her i was texting him at work teasin him about it but sent it to his mom by accident
What's he like?
The usual. Sarcastic, dark, full of fucked up emotional problems that result in fantastic sexual prowess.
I feel like letting the same guy who shot him dig the pellet out of his leg with a pocket knife was the bigger mistake
as much as i want to say no i cant cause i need the trophy wife training
I am dressed. And we didn't do anything. He's gorgeous and tall tho. Something nice to look at when I'm hungover
I mean i can't really be mad...either way i was gonna fuck him or hate fuck him, so it's basically a win/win situation.
Since the world is still here you can go ahead and disregard those pictures I sent
It's times where you wake up in the hospital after trying to road surf that you wonder what you're doing in life.
Oh okay. That's fine. I'll buy us both dinner when you bail me out
It's a post jail date
I masturbated to my balding thirty-something co-worker last night. I am a new level of lonely.
He played with my boobs the whole time we watched Scott Pilgrim and then started invited others to play with them too. It reminded me of how my mom gives out my french fries without asking.
Also this is super embarrassing but sorry for licking your chest
Can I borrow your google glasses to make a sex tape?
I was dressed as Waldo and the cops kept saying looks like we fuckin found you
Have you ever forgotten how to pee? I did last night. Standing in front of the urinal with dick in hand. WTF were we drinking???
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