You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
i hope youre ready for a shit show because we just ordered a whole pitcher of red headed sluts
Let's not refer to him as Dustin. That makes him seek like a real person, not just a dick I would like to experience.
I should have slept with you when you were wearing the gorilla suit. I've had dreams about your chest hair. I hope jail wasn't too bad.
I just saw that blonde chick you wanna bang rolling down the hall wearing a Thor mask..
Wow. We're meant to be..
I really think that guy just walks around with tennis balls in his pocket. No dick is that big
You know it's been a rough year when your therapist mouth is just wide open. And I didn't even get to the real issue!
So is the trick to long distance communication to be drunk during phone conversations?
Shut up. You had me at killer robots. Your place or mine?
BOOOOOOOOOOOO *takes away your hoe card*
He just sprayed AXE in his mouth to get rid of his bad breath... THAT DRUNK
You wouldnt listen to us when we told you there was no place that was selling girlscout cookies at 4:30am...
My parents are coming to visit the 28th. How bad is it that I put a reminder in my phone to "hide sex toys"?
Weird. And pubic lice are now endangered so your hairy balls can rest easy
That’s the third time this month he’s hooked up with a girl by telling her it’s his bachelor party, and he’s not even dating a chick let alone engaged.
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