she had a my little ponys comforter. i left when she went to the bathroom
after we had sex he told me his original plan was to have sex with my roommate but his buddy likes her so i was backup
Don't worry about it. Anal sex isn't always sunshine and wildflowers.
Of course he did. He is like the oprah winfrey for vaginas. Always giving that shit away.
She wasnt impressed wen i brought a guy for her back with me, a 3am impromptu sperm donor is not a gd birthday present. Im a bad gf.
So getting drunk in honor of the bomb threat is legit right?
My blowjobs put them in a state of relaxation similar to that of getting hit with a tranquilizer. The fear comes after the sex.
He took the Gold in Olympic clit licking last night. Canada should be proud.
I'm watching Russian dudes pole-dance. For research.
Definitely just threw up in a mcds cup going through Wendy's drive thru. I'm way to hungover to go to work today
Would it be inappropriate to send a friend request to the sheriff that fingerprinted me last night???
First poop in my apartment for the summer, officially settled in. :)
I woke up at 2 AM to find them in my living room with a radio flyer wagon full of milk glass plates and a Holstein cow. How am I going to explain this to my landlord!?!
I just want to see his penis in the light. Is that a crime?
Nope. I'm an adult now. I can successfully avoid to vomit in defiance of the porcelain god\n
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