Ugh I have so many sins to confess tmw at church, you just made me think of many more I've made on that street alone
I have a deodorant stick dedicated to my balls.
True Life: I hate vaginal excretions
I had forgotten what it was like to go to all four classes. It's exhausting.
I cant even remember his name or what he looked like. all I remember is what the tattoo on his forearm looked like.
well, he kindof looked like a walmart greeter. I tried to stop you
It's not my theme song, it's my blowjob song. There's a difference.
it's my sixth sense. If there's an orgy within 20 miles of me i'll know about if. Or be a part of it.
Thats the worst face I've ever seen you make an I've seen you throw up in your own hair.
This whole bra on the outside of my shirt thing is so convenient. It turns my shirt into a pocket to eat Fritos out of. Mmm boobies
I haven't been that free with the boobs since I was 19. I'm putting them away for a while.
If you insist
The one guy literally flopped my boob out. Yes I insist.
Would I be a horrible mom if I got a babysitter at 6am so I could go get laid.
Is banging someone in the national guard considered a state service or a national one?
Hey know anyone who wants 58 lbs of whole frozen chickens for a couple bowls?
I'm a peeled potato compared to her. I'm a peeled potato compared to anyone. I'm a peeled potato.
Are you high?
Wait you took his virginity AND broke his bed doing it
I know! I’m the best!
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