So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
Lady with a stroller in a bar. Think she's out of my league?
I don't understand how people can have that much vomit in them
He slapped my ass and hummed the jello theme song, which was followed by an overly loud "IT'S ALIVE!"
so apparently telling her she could shit easier and therefore lose weight faster wasn't the best arguement for getting anal.
I haven't been "cry when you eat ben and jerrys" high in a while.
Like if Robert Downey Jr. and Kiefer Sutherland got together for a bender, that's how drunk I want us to be.
You could have chosen coming to fuck me over getting too hammered to drive. But you made your bed, and now you get to jack off alone in it.
If for no other reason than to cuddle with that puppy, you have to hook up with him again.
we left the music on while we were fucking. some kanye west song started playing and he started to cry
Just had a 40 min argument about how many celebrity guest appearances on Sesame Street were court ordered for DUIs.
I wish buying curtains was as easy as buying drugs. I already KNOW what I want and what the outcome will be: awesome.
Where's Taylor bro?
Never mind found him under the sink
I was hoping for a marriage proposal... Or at least an offer to sleep in his bed.
too bad burritos don't cuddle back
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