If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
my math professor just wrote "parallel" on the board, but spelled it "pararrel". guess what country he's from
I am solely responsible for the birth of their child. I mean, I did push them into the room and hold the door shut yelling "punch that kitty!". It has to be a sign.
Didn't know what to wear so I ripped off my bed sheets and tied myself a toga. "a little hungover" is no way to describe me right now.
I am eating deep fried cinnamon rolls and I found a lighter in my sprinkles. I miss you.
I went to the bar saying i wasn't going to drink that much. I forgot sobriety might as well be some mythical creature when you're with Holleey
I definitely pole-danced a parking meter outside a party last night. The cheering was appreciated.
When I'm famous, she'll look at her kids and go "I saw her buttcheeks beefore she was famous. I'm truly blessed."
Apparently I send drunk snapchats a lot and they always have random dudes in them. Like one night it was just me and some guy I don't know sitting on my couch.
I think as a general rule I have to have blacked out somewhere at least twice to be comfortable.
I've been here 20 minutes and a sweaty naked man has kissed me on the cheek.
You dropped my mother on the dance floor. She has a concussion. You didn't apologize. Don't speak to me for a while.
But of course I'm in. After all, what fun would the holidays be without trying to find the perfect gift to impress someone you've never met, but need the approval of??
He fed me Girl Scout cookies while I was still tied up...what did I do right?
my favorite part was when you kept waving @ that guy and insisiting it was your cousin..and it wasnt and wondering why he wasnt waving back lol you were legit PISSED
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