He started yelling "we're making a baby" mid thrust.. probably not the right guy for me right?
Every night before bed, when I used to say prayers, now I just think to myself 'freshman sluts. Soon'
We got so high we made milksteak
You were so drunk last night you typed www.face.come/cheese.com as if you were logging into facebook.
When we ran out of red solo cups we switched to Starbucks cups for beer pong... Who doesn't want to live in Seattle?
my bartender licked my nipple. never stay after hours
Water park on acid. THIS NEEDS TO HAPPEN!!
I don't care if he was in that porno. He looked like he knew what he was doing.
You need to get laid. You spent last night stumbling through the club pulling couples apart and telling them to leave room for Jesus.
I don't understand why you aren't on this trip all I do is smoke weed drink beer and get fingered
It's called hot rabbit the party if he asks the password is "careful" don't ask
In the morning he said my plan to make 2 casseroles today was, "hot in a grandma sort of way," & I didn't think it was weird. THAT'S how hot he was.
Started crying to "that's the way it is" by celine. What the fuck uterus?!
He also needs to focus on not being such a little bitch, but that's none of my business.
I thought we agreed to no sexting at the school bake sale...
Randomize
