took him home. told him i would rock his world. passed out. a for effort f for follow thru
I think its only fitting my first purchase with my student loan is a glass pipe? I think ill name it 'Subsidized'
Wasn't a date. In exchange for artichoke dip I received a bj. And sex. It was a transaction.
So my dealer asked me if I wanted to join his circle because we smoked so much this summer he thinks we're dealing
Thank you, I really appreciate that. I know I couldn't participate in class tonight and I hope that doesn't affect my grade too much. So please let me know of any extra credit opportunities such as fellatio
New year means new boundaries for the Brazilian lady.. I'm pretty sure I got wax on my asshole
I convinced a shit ton of people I was a russian foreign exchange student to get free drinks. I knew learning those accents would come in handy.
Update: I may or may not be in a cult
Update #2: I may or may not be the leader of said cult
I'm the man of the house if we're referring to livers.
I don't want any of this. I just want big sausages.
60% of the guys I've slept with are on my holiday greeting card mailing list. I'm an amazing ex lover.
I snuck out three pillows from the hotel i was rolling so hard. They are like little clouds. I regret nothing.
Fuck. Totally just had sex instead of studying for econ test in an hour. Gonna get fucked again. HELP ME WITH YOUR EXTENSIVE KNOWLEDGE OF ECON
I'm too horny to sleep. I need some violent sex to wind me down.
There will be bowls smoken and not a single fuck will be given.
Randomize
