do you remember what downloading porn with a 14k modem was like?
isnt it creepy that our bodies make people
TBS has betrayed me by telling me tyler perry is funny
is it bad that I only want to go to my boyfriends house bc I want to see his roomate walk around with his shirt off?
they night at the roxbarryed us. came out of nowhere,bought us shots, and then the big one licked my hand? we got out of that noise.
Well Its not like I planned having my potato launcher explode and burn off my eyebrow and eye lashes.. I still have my right eyebrow can't u just be happy?
She can't meet us until 830...there's no hope for our sobriety at that hour
I replaced his Viagra pills with sleeping pills.
You shouted, "LOOK I'M HAWKEYE," and beaned mike with a dildo from across the room.
We'll never be able to grow apart now. You can't look at a stranger & say "Yea I ate goldfish crackers off his dick." & just be casual about that.
I'm pretty sure I just orgasmned my way out of paying for that weed
Got home & pissed on my moms carpet like a bear in the woods. I woke up to a picture message with me passed out on the floor with my pants down & hands covering my face. I've had an awkward week
He took a shit in my shoe. A part of me is livid and a part of me is impressed because that’s some real evil genius.
I brought coffee but not enough for the naked guy on your porch
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
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