the couple across the street's about to bang. go get the popcorn and come join us.
walk of shame with early morning football tailgaters. niice.
Just say its a British thing. They wont know Its not. And if they say you're not British, proposition them for a post-sex game of cricket.
I don't know if I should be scared or excited that I can officially drink vodka on the rocks like it's 7up.
Stayed out til 7 am.... Did u know there's a guy who goes up and down the quad at that hour playing bagpipes?
No just a slight sexual miscommunication which led to a little (lot) vomiting by one party and a bruised sternum on the other party involved.
I can't even make a guess how that goes.
I asked him if we could switch positions so I could watch the Olympics... I'd say date number two is a miss
We grabbed as many adult diapers as we could and made a run for it.
We can get drunk and battle coyotes
So you broke your ribs while fucking? Dude you just got about 25% hotter.
Just come home. We will have sex and Taco Bell. I'm feeling wild, I put on temporary tattoos.
Once again, marijuana saves me from going to jail
SpongeBob is life. I once broke up with a guy bc he said SpongeBob was stupid.
The day will come again young grasshopper. For now you must complete your training of patience and tongue biting
They want a bedroom just for their cats. And you thought we were gay.
Randomize
