TYLER... glimpse of last night: leather chaps, guacamole dip, a jump rope, spray paint, and rhinestone studded pajamas.
i think you have the wrong number... but your story sounds delightful.
Dude love is like an itch. You fuckin scratch it, then it itches more, then you scratch it and it itches more, and before you know it, there is semen everywhere.
you are insane
I was so high i believed someone when they told me le moyne beat syracuse
well hello there hangover. fancy meeting you here on this BRIGHT thursday morning.
Got high and weighed everything in the house. My head is 16.2 pounds. Is that ok?
i'm sorry i gave your brother a handjob while you were on the blanket next to us, but to be fair your back was turned.
I'm in a pile of cheezits at an unfamiliar location watching dateline on tlc. Stage an intervention.
So the bitch asked me if I wanted the name brand or the generic contraceptive. Does it look like I want to be generically pregnant?
first thing my tuition money buys is a strap on
I unknowingly motorboated my boyfriend's ex-gf last night. Yay me!
I think if you have sex on the couch it will psychologically damage it.
That was the first time I ever heard of a female getting road head while driving... thanks for the memory and making me happy ending..
Why the fuck is there raw bacon in my bra. I don't even have a stove.
she broke the sink..i repeat the sink is off the wall. send help
Don't send me pics of cunning dicks while I'm eating potato chips
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