wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
She told me I was starting to look like a mermaid with herpes and I needed to stop it.
im sure we could have fun without alcohol but i just dont wanna chance it...
it's just like freshman year of high school, with more drugs
i was calling myself "cat the lion" and tried eating the computer mouse because i thought it was "my prey"
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
The one wearing a viking helmet and holding a bottle of Smirnoff. She's laying on the floor of the tube singing "cant find my way home" . You can't miss her..
thanks for being my moral compass. and thanks for not always pointing north so i can be slutty and not feel bad about it.
I can't tell whether I'm a) still hungover from two nights ago, b) legitimately sick or c) all of the above... multiple choice was never my forte
there is a guy passed out on top of me and i don't know what to do. help if you're awake? was anyone anyone expecting someone? maybe he found the wrong room?
Last night you texted me "tqiirkykbg doe freedom always"... why?
I assume you passed out however I'm drinking jäger and beer in bed with my cat so your friendship world have been appreciated
There is a goat eating lettuce out of our fridge. Do you wanna grab a bloody mary?
Soo I'm in the trunk of a car drunk about to jump on trampolines. My life rocks!
um care to explain the stolen chinchila under greg's bed..i'd be fine with it if it wasnt chewing up the stash
Randomize