PS - I'm in bed with an 18 yr old-am I a cougar?
No - puma.
I can't get into him, he looks really young. I'd feel like I was blowing the Gerber baby.
Hey. Did u tell any1 that I use Nuvaring?
Cuz 1 of ur bf's frat bros just asked me if I wanted to "play ring toss later"
Black out sex on the trampoline? yes please.
Ohhh, TODAY your worried. Becasue last weekend when we warned you about her you said "shes too hot to have herpes."
Ugh did we play golf last night and did you by chance hit my head with a club or a ball?
Laying in bed nude eating a Big Mac with a cat. It's gonna be a good year.
He doesn't drink liquor so instead of doing a body shot off my belly button he dropped water in there and sipped it out with a straw. Look at my face: =|
Full disclosure. I fucked the fatty from work and shit is weird now.
Note to self: Never spend $8 on a liter of rum again
Pssh I just bang a girl in a single person tent. Thats like the back seat of a sedan.
I woke up to pizza pinned to my wall. So that's that.
Basically one minute I'm sucking on her nipples and then 45 mins later we're at work and she's my boss.
anyways, do you want to make more embarrassing memories that im bound to remind you about later and laugh about?
how did i manage to wake up with my bra on backwards?
Randomize
