Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
Black out sex on the trampoline? yes please.
chipotle is closed for thanksgiving... I am officially thankful for NOTHING.
He spent the whole night convincing me I wasn't fat, but after we had sex he said "Oh, I see what you mean"
James and whatshisface bought me drunks. I am drinks.
i'm so sad bro, I can't get any pussy. I'm so sad
he came within less than a minute of me blowing him. this was our second night hanging out in a row. for an almost 30 year old italian man, he is NOT living up to his country's reputation
I hope to God 2011 is the year I stop loving tequila.
When someone comes out of your vagina and stomps on your dreams, you'll understand.
Ok- my dad's ex-wife's Irish nephew. Weird if we fuck or not?
I'm sitting on the floor singing Bruno mars while they cook and occasionally pet me
Just gave my pregnant cat a safe sex talk. That high.
I'm at the level of despair that only Panda Express can fix
FYI, his "son" is a Chihuahua.
He literally ejaculated and I hit Uber
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