Got a plan. Ill do rock paper scissors and if you win we smoke a joint. Throw rock.
its sad that the first thing i assume is that ur trying to indirectly tell me you fucked on a breakfast table
by asking you if you bought one for the apartment?
you're letting him buy you a plane ticket...to kentucky...so you can fuck him?
i know. i'm only adding to the interstate sex trade problem.
Dude totally calling you out on watching when harry met sally on netflix on demand on april 8th.
Being a slut is okay if you're being a polite slut, right?
The only word I understood in that whole setence was semen.
I could seriously attempt to try and saw my head in half with a butter knife cause im pretty sure it could not hurt any more than it already does
I mean...he was throwing up for almost 3 consecutive hours. I don't think there's a chance in hell that would have tasted even close to tolerable.
threw up in the kitchen showroom. home depot employee of the month.
You came on the chandelier from the first floor.. Of course were allowed back
If my sophomore year were to be made into a novel, it would be titled "dances with salvia"
I was at a bus stop, eating a load of bread. Fairly sure I'm the poster child for poor students.
Her car is covered in frozen vomit, and she lost her iPhone. I'm also pretty sure I smoked crack last night. Rest in peace 2014.
Awake! can you bring me my pants...im under the couch
I should've known a straight guy wouldn't know all the words to Moana
Randomize