What ever happened to making out with a few boob grabs here and there?
Already tried, she's too smart for that. I need a Primos "Do your wife in the butt" lure/call to trick her into wanting it
I don't care what you say, cheap wine does NOT taste better in expensive crystal...
It totally doesn't make me a groupie if I hooked up with him before he was in the Olympics
Oh and fyi, I've been drinking and about to do free weights. I'll late you know how this goes.
When the tupperware hit the highway it was like a vomit bomb
red lips, whiskey sips, shaking hips, nipple slips. my life as a rap song.
They just showed up to the party with a shopping cart full stolen of naty ice cans, no boxes, just cans. Shit just got real !
Attempting to sleep without a bra since i got my nips pierced wish me luck. Also almost sent that to my coworker.
When the nurse referred to my vag as "your downstairs", I knew I found the perfect Doctors office.
Took off my bra at the laundry mat to throw it in I am officially white trash
He stopped me mid blowjob and asked me to take off my hat. He said it made him feel like Neil Young was going down on him.
I got horny for like a second but the eggplant snapped me out of it
Things were going really well until his cousin showed up. She told him I look kind of like his mom, which started a ten-minute debate on my and his mother's specific features, and ultimately, who is prettier. Guess who my date picked.
I need your opinion, is it ACTUALLY sweet that a booty call offered to walk me home with an umbrella because it was raining, or is that just low standards?
Randomize