It was at that point the crowd that gathered realized i wasn't getting arrested, and passed the sobriety tests. I got a standing ovation from 25 strangers
I like waking up with a slight hangover cause I'm dehydrated and it makes me feel thinner.
He used one end of the towel to wipe the cum and I used the other end to wipe the tears
His dick might not be the answer to my problems, but I'm definitely ok with testing it as a possible solution.
Balls are wasted. Waste are ballsted. Ballsd wasted
You need to come over. I cant get her to stop eating honey mustard straight from the squeeze bottle
We listened to Rod Stewart Pandora and slow danced in the shower.
Yeah I fingered her in the crowd and the dj saw it and gave me props over the speakers. I got so many high fives.
I WISH WE COULD PLAY THE DRINKING GAME TOGETHER AND THEN BANG FOR AMERICA.
My dick pics could make it to the popular page on Instagram.
I had to ask him for a dick pic. Do you know how refreshing that was?
I'm sure there's been a weekend in 2014 we were sober... Clearly it wasn't fun, bc I can't recall it. Point proven, alcohol is key.
You had sex with him AND his man bun. Like not just him but also the bun.
That’s talent right there. Maverick and Goose type shit.
Kinda thinking about going to my moms wedding high
Randomize
