Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
How do you get a cum stain out of a trampoline?
i wouldn't be half as slutty if there were better things to do.
im watching shaqs comedy special. this is how i know im not sober.
The wedding was scheduled to start 5 min. ago. 20 people here so far, groomsmen in tees and jeans, catering by Costo. NO ONE OUR AGE IS READY FOR MARRIAGE!
I just asked the dr if it was herpes while wearing my shirt from the strip club...
I told you to stay away from the strippers in Oklahoma
Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
I'm drinking red wine & feeding anchovies to the dog. I'm really not picky about what kinda of company I'm in.
She's yelling about threesomes and realllly wants you to come over. Put the pieces together.
You tried to luge a beer down a flip flop.
Didn't shower and drew a couple dicks on my face before I went to work. Boss sent me home. Sacrificed my dignity for a 3 day weekend with you guys.
like, is this a date?? I'm sitting on his couch drinking a juice box while he makes taquitos in sweat pants
I'm gonna give the church their tithe, and the rest is a down payment on boobs.
So Blakes coming home... so if youre like fingerbanging the shit out of yourself on the kitchen table...wrap it up
Perfect attendance and not being drunk since Sunday. This is a new leaf if I've ever seen one
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