OH RELAX, IT WAS PITY SEX.....
Haha na a cat just ran under your car. Howd that happen?
Probably a woman cat. Doesnt think things through
there is nothing more satisfying than playing sudoku while pooping
Vaginas are confusing as hell with all their secret compartments and shit.
I'll get my vaginal cartography poster.
Are my feet made of real feet?
Pushiiing vjews 4 ma daz caik
Lyk hr kuds 4
I woke up to a gnawing sound in the middle of the night and asked him what it was. He told me it was the family of squirrels that lives in the wall and to go back to sleep.
Last night in my drunkenness I bought hurricane supplies which included a jug of wine and a bouquet of flowers. Apparently I'm going to woo Irene.
it's just one of those nights where i don't care if anyone sees my vagina
Just finished two pages in like 20-30 mins bitches SHWAMP DRUNK LIBRARY SHWAMP
I think the "tmi" ship sailed a long time ago, and it took our dignities with it..
I am thinking about buying a decorative chest for all our sex stuff....
My mute roommate is using sign language to ask a guy to fuck her.
Why is the turtle in the toilet again?
Well as I was puking in the tub I put him in there to keep me company but I am almost positive the original setup was him in the tub and me next to the toilet...I hope he likes tequila
I looked into her soul, didn't I?
You eye-fucked her soul.
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