If i come over, it means nothing
awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
This is the worst date ever. Pls kill me. No, wait, scratch that, stick to the original plan of killing Paris Hilton, I'll live though this
Sometimes I kiss girls just to make them shut up.
I hope the doctor doesnt lift up and my shirt and listen to my lungs. I dont want to explain why I have rug burns on my back.
While looking for an apartment, I've realized that the way I rate balconies is on the "how easy would it be to smoke weed here" scale.
What other scale is there?
A gentleman never tells..... therefore i will neither confirm nor deny the attatched photos
Fuck you for setting me up with the guy from the Nickelback cover band
Payback for not stopping me from fucking the guy in the wookie costume
Yea we just broke up
so do we start sexting now or later?
If I wasn't stoned and knee deep in cheese and crackers I'd help.
So doing the math I dated almost 2 of me in penises. Like, if I you layed them out lengthwise it would be 2 times my height.
I swear man, you fly across the country to give a boy your virginity and he suddenly thinks you like him
Tune in tm morning for how to buy Plan B in a foreign country while coming down off ecstasy
I can insert a female catheter, but I cannot grill a cheese.
please come back. it's turned into strip rock paper scissors
Randomize
