spell your last name, im trying to find you on facebook
he quoted cool runnings while we were having sex: feel the rythm,feel the rhyme, get on up, its bobsled time
she was seriously choking and the whole time all he kept saying was "that's what she said"
I can't make this stuff up. Your ex is singing I Will Survive on the karaoke.
Just when you think you're never going to have sex again, BOOM you're naked in bed with a guatemalan
Look what our sorority has done to us...we're hitting on girls in hopes of getting an awesome little.
I dunno, but she kept buying me shots and asking me to go places with her. oh btw we're signed up to go bungee jumping Saturday
Are you sighing at your phone and judging me right now?
That one dude should feel honored if he were to get herpes from you. Fuck that Guy. He is a herpe.
His dick is as big as my 7" heels... Awkwardness is forgotten.
They just dared her to tape flip flops to her tits. Entertainment value cannot be found like this in any other part of America.
Can you send me a picture of your dog? I might need to borrow him so I can wear a speedo to a pool party on Friday
I'm sorry but if you can talk well enough to critique his oral game, he clearly needs the pointers.
He shampooed and conditioned his pubes but can't manscape for shit.
I just got through airport security with 5 grams of weed in my back pocket. Either I deserve a metal or the government is slacking
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