you're like the ceasar milan of boners... you understand them on a different level.
I've decided that I only have enough money to either eat or drink over the next month. I'm sure you know what choice I've made.
NoDDING MY HEAD LIKE uyuEAH MOViUNG MY HiPS LioKe YEAhhhhhhhhhhh
wow.
Standing in line for a prescreening of Alice in Wonderland - guy just passed out cold in front of us - first drug overdose of the Alice in Wonderland phenomenon witnessed.
i did make 45 jello shots and that makes me feel more productive then any paper would
you can add "aspirated seaman" to the list of things your sister has been admitted to the hospital for
I don't believe u have enough text space to describe the dimensions of his penis.
Crazy how fast a room full of drunk teenagers sober up when someone breaks his parents' new flat screen
My chiropractor just high fived me for getting drunk enough to throw my back out this weekend.. Life. Complete.
banged a milf last night. she left right after cause of parent teacher conferences this morning. victory.
Whatever. I am not explaining the physics of my dick slapping.
woke up to a case of keystone on my porch when I went to bed at seven that morning.. I think it's someone's peace offering for getting my roommates car towed
Would you by any chance know if there is a proper protocol for traveling with one's vibrator? I wouldn't want the TSA to rip open my suitcase in front of my boss.
I was totally going to fuck him and then his friend walked in brushing his teeth, whipped down his pants and started doing the windmill. Ultimate cock block
my mom tells me this morning that i was blasting teach me how to dougie at 2 am last night and refused to leave her room until she dougied with me
Randomize
