So he passed out in the bathroom of the bar, woke up thinking he was somewhere else and called her flipping his shit because he thought she left him. She had to go into the men's bathroom to find him, and then he told her she was "trying too hard to be his girlfriend" over and over again.
Dont they live together now? Havent they been together for like two years?
Yeah. That's the best part. I always thought he was kind of a pussy but turns out he's a degenerate just like us. Welcome
shit is crazy. i just keep thinking that this kid growing inside Emily used to live in my balls.
We were laughing at the passed out guy who had gone to sleep under the car in the McDonald's lot until we realized it was you.
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
So for a second i just thought clitoris was a disease.
The only piece of furniture in the apartment is a wine rack.
I dont know if you relize this but ive been high ly medicated in my room for a whil now. GOing out into the real world would make me li ke tom ha nks. im not ready to be tom hanks..
The shit show didn't end. it just relocated itself to my apartment instead of yours.
you also need to get my treadmill fixed.
He tried to take a picture of me naked but only got my ass. I don't know his name but if my butt is a guys wallpaper, that's the one I boned.
I was ok with it until you started yelling " just the tip!" I know she's you gf but don't backseat drive the three-way.
You were definitely drunk. You gave him an otphj in front of everyone.
You know the sex was good when he had to ask which way was north before he left.
I'll do my best. he just keeps yelling beer and doing dick helicopters
Cancelling your gym membership calls for alcohol.
If he moved really quickly from "hi I've had a crush on you for years" to "send nudes" you probably were used.
Randomize