Rocking a Headband at the strip club, because of Rock of Love this shit is like their kryptonite, I smell like stripper butter and back child support.
were not allowed back there because i puked on the waitresses foot while trying to order another round. for myself.
Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
i am breaking up with you. because you wash your hair too much and you only drink light beer and because you're not party enough.
I have the money I owe you for auctioning off your black thongs. Best 30 bucks ever spent
The camera shows a viking with a white mask, a creepy green guy, a gorilla, and a pumpkin throwing eggs and laundry detergent in his yard
OHHH and there was a Batman too.
It's pitch dark except for the glow sticks, someone turned the heat up as high as it would go and the bathroom is flooded. Also think I just stepped on someone's face.
You tried to bite my nipple like 3 times
NAh son
Just general bites
Is it festive if I masturbate to Santa porn?
Below this exterior of ice is a layer of cum. Followed by a pool of gin. More cum. Then, finally a heart.
HE FINALLY TEXT ME AND CALLED ME BY MY TWITTER NAME STAND BY FOR THE WEDDING INVITE, BRIDESMAID
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
You make me want to do things that I'm pretty sure are illegal.
My books smell like weed. What does that tell you about my college experience?
Thumbs up
He’s like an awkward walking penis that has a personality attached
Randomize
