carls jr on main st. japanese tourist taking a dump in the urinal. reading a japanese newspaper and wearing a full suit.
be there in 3 mins
I will be horny for about another two hours. Feel free to call me until then.
Who would have guessed that ordering a vodka lemonade at Roscoe's was code for I want a hand job
his dick is like his red hair, amazing but useless
Fucking freshmen need to learn how to puke in the bushes outside the dorm and not in the fucking elevator.
Just coerced a Santa to buy me a handle. Tis the season.
found inexpensive tickets to Norway. Questioning if its legal. PLEASE tell me you remebered the walkie talkies and face paint.
We didn't have a blender so we made the margaritas by running over a garbagebag full of ice with the car and then stirring it with a knife in a French-press coffee pot. CAN YOU SAY RESOURCEFUL?
Apparently you can coat check a keg.
After he finished going down on me he came up from under the covers, threw his hands into the air and shouted "take that lesbians!" and finished with "and we have dicks!"
From one hot mess to another... Get it together.
We need a fire pit. Meat. And a keg.I mean like a cow we just carve from. And cook it. We can use the milk from the udder to make White Russians
You could sing the national anthem right before we have sex. Make it feel like a sporting event
god i just can't wait for finals to end so i can just masturbate all day and night
My Mini-Van Handjob Milf is leaving the company. I need to find a new job. I can’t handle this place without those handjobs
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