yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
theres a middle aged lesbian couple holding hands on the bus and a 17 or 18 year old christian girl visibly staring freaked out and audibly praying about it
How do I say to her "Have you eaten mango lately because my penis had an allergic reaction"
So, just so you know... Your vasectomy worked.
bonus
every time you want to hook up with a guy who has a girl friend, i'll just give you a freshman
Where'd you guys get the alcohol from?
Oh. Some homeless guy we picked up from I-70. He bought us $400 worth of alcohol in exchange for a shower.
...... wtf.
and being hungover still at 4 in the afternoon is NOT "having allergies"
Just to an Octoberfest and a sex party. Nothing wild.
You were supposed to be my wingman and all you kept to her friend was "kill it with fire"..
Serious concern: will TSA confiscate my bondage rope?
He has great taste in girls. I feel closer to my Eskimo sisters than my real sister...
Side note: I just realized that I can make my hand warmers double as a heated push up bra.
I'm hosting my annual valentine's day party tomorrow with every hookup I've ever had. thoughts on how it will turn out ??
Need advice bro. Which one should I take: the blonde devil crying in the corner or the brunette crawling on the floor acting like a dinosaur??
I bonged champagne. And did keg stands. What in the actual fuck am I doing with my life?
Randomize
