Godddamnit i jsu woke up in oharee. My connecxtion left an hro ago. Thosse flight atttendants can DRinK
Nothing says "I love you" like a full raw dog.
i'll give you all the meat in my fridge in exchange for 2 condoms.
I'm not sure what happened last night, but my turtle seems afraid of me.
I tried douching with a turkey baster. Not the brightest idea.
She needs to learn she only fits into our friendship as a DD.
She fucked me for a ride to the airport. If this is what the rest of college is like, I'm never graduating.
Last night was just one giant freudian slip.
You made out with EVERYBODY.
Can I just bleach my life?
just gonna show up naked this time. that way i dont have to worry about finding my clothes tomorrow
When I tell my children how I survived hurricane Sandy I'll probably leave out the threesome
It wasn't a great time! You grabbed me, picked me up, and make me pee in the sink!
I have wine with a bendy straw bitches I can do fucking anything
..and by hang out i don't mean fucking then going back home i mean let's get something to eat & watch a movie and fuck sometime in between.
I hope that will b the last time i take off my pants in the chemistry building.
Three cans of beer can fit in the shower catty... multi tasking
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