She wanted to test if her costume allows her to still have sex in it. It does
He just washed his hands with scrubbing bubbles yelling "They work hard so I don't have to!"
Apparently I climbed into a dryer last night and refused to leave... There are pictures to prove it
After a certain blood-alcohol level, the dog is in charge.
This is simple. Just sex and high fives. No feelings.
Well once I told her I had a girlfriend she actually got more aggressive. Then Danielle called me and she saw the pic of the two of us on my phone and immediately said "can my caller I'd pic be me sitting on your face" wtf?
What do you mean you don't want me to steal the manikin do you have any idea how expensive inflatable dolls are I can't get that for your birthday
I made a wizard staff out of Keystone light... I am therefore the smoothest wizard in all of our university's history.
Matt and I's climactic adventure has ended with Matt being hauled off to jail. And now his brother and I are having lunch and a beer.
I went shopping for a dress that was baptism and bar appropriate.
She stopped me mid sex to ask if she could finish my ramen, I've found the one.
How is it that I can make it to my 8am Friday morning still drunk after passing out the night before...but not to my 9am on Tuesday that I went to bed early for? Irony or karma?
Sex. Target parking lot. I really am the mayor.
With a word you would own me. At your command I would walk to your house completely naked.
Don't EVER mix a flaming shot, with a Jello shot.. As good as it sounds flaming Jello is not a good idea
Randomize
