I knew we were gonna fuck after she told me she's seen that Porno before
he said the way to his heart was through his stomach, i told him if he wanted to eat my food he had to eat my kitty
smooth operator
Apparently I promised a worker at La Siesta free English lessons to make up for vomming all over the little Mariachi band.
Every time I try to stand up the back of my head feels like a bunch of little elves are beating the inside of my scalp with their toy making tools. What disease could this be?
I just peed behind the dumpster and dedicated it to you. Can i call u?
not sure if I should be concerned that my brother just stormed into my room and looked at me with a serious face and said, "I'm a peacock, you have to let me fly." oh, vicodin...
When I said to shut up, I meant it. I'm sorry you have a bald spot now, but it was necessary.
I'm in Starbucks carrying the boxes wine and the hubcap. So many judging looks.
Is it possibile to sprain your taint?
She was that bad?
I woke up to see that I had ripped my boxers into a loin cloth because we were watching last of the mohicans
I just coughed and my vagina hurt. We need to hook up more.
it was so good i reconsidered my staunch atheism
But on the plus side, what he lacked in size he made up for with speed. And grunting.
JUST BECAUSE I LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED DOESNT MEAN IM GOING TO LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED AT WORK
Good, I would never sleep with your boyfriend , or send you an edible arangment
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