We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
you wouldn't come out from under your bed because you said there were six-armed bears everywhere.
ohhh that explains the pepperonis I found in my sock drawer this morning...
no it doesn't.
They peed on our pledges last night... i dont know if i should put an lol at the end of that or not
Just put the gallon of milk in the microwave. Dad might know im high.
Next time we're there I want drunk pics of us trying to ride the stone lions downtown. Don't even attempt to fight me on this.
Maybe walking up to the cops busting our party with a "Things go better with Coke" t-shirt on and asking for my extra license back that my little brother got busted with wasn't the best idea of the night.
how many lesbians have to have their hearts broken before they realise I am not that kind of DJ
Just your daily reminder that we're terrible people: the average number of men a woman sleeps with in their lifetime is 4
Found a phone out last night at the bar. EPIC homemade porn vids on it!
My neck is PURPLE. This is NOT a good day to be indoctrinated by the cardinal...
Soo are you just gonna poop in my bathtub and not talk to me anymore...?
Nice classy night out before we roll our faces off
He can move his dick. Like on its own. WHY DID I NOT GIVE BLOWJOBS BEFORE?!
Going on a coke binge the night before your appointment with your therapist (to talk about your sex addiction) is prob not the best idea.
I've been in town for almost 36 hrs and I haven't made out with a stranger yet - I consider THAT a record!
Randomize
