omg a stripper jus od'd on stage.
At the same time. Hot men feeding me brownies. In between rounds of sex.
handjobs have no place on a baseball diamond
gave him road head on the way to his grandparents house. purposely didn't let him finish, the sexual tension over turkey was indescribable.
Will you judge me if i do shots in my basement closet first? No? Okay good
Eric and I just went in the hallway to practice our new handshake in a real life situation at live speeds. That high.
You were telling me last night 101 proof was nothing and you needed 400 proof or better yet military or marine proof, because you're marine grade.... You rascal.
I'm puking in a turkey pan....
Had sex with the Irish bartender in Spain. So that happened.
i took four shots of tequila, threw my fist up in the air, then went around the party showing everyone how to do the ninja turtle handshake. that's the last thing I remember
Would it be crossing a line if I told him that I now know his girlfriend has a huge mole on her left ass cheek?
Orientation leader success, day 1: incoming freshman just ate out his first sorority girl. I gave him a 7/10.
I'm drunk eating a quesadilla while this kid is tryina come over and I'm just like no. I want the quesadilla.
We have angered the beer gods. It feels like I'm shitting angry cats.
I just put poptarts in the toaster with the wrapper on, that's how hungover I am.
She's the other freshman on this drunken voyage
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