i was drunk at family dinner telling about my gay brothers sex ads on criags list
Michael Jackson had a heart attack when he found out boyz to men was a music group not a delivery service.
Through a series of unfortunate circumstances, I think I just sprayed lime juice on my vagina.
I wish i could tell a story about guys I know without the phrase "and then I blew him." coming up.
now I know why they wanted me to come. apparently gay guys are stripper magnets
were lost, were cold and we don't know what to do with the stray cat we found.
Yes perhaps we are both wrong. And did you call me bj girl?
Eating this pizza pocket is like eating out god
shes wearing an ankle tracker so she should be easy to find
A very confused plastic surgeon just called. Apparently I called asking how much it costs to get a vodka funnel installed straight to my brain...
you said you didn't want to carry the pizza box so just folded up the pizza and put it in your pocket
She yelled out "MCDREAMY" mid orgasm
I fucked your neighbor. Welcome to the new apartment!
It's such a sad loss when a hot guy finds Jesus and grows a neckbeard
I fucked a 6 foot tall guy who has abs showing without even flexing... I am a wizard and I have magical powers.
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