So it's 10:55am and I just woke up on the floor in the hallway on the4th floor. There should probably be no moredrinking competetions.
Her life must suck. All she's got is "Miss Shamrock" WHICH SHE LOST!
She just ended a sentence with "and he doesn't even mind my herpes..."
He just showed up at my house and was like "have you seen an axe laying around?" he wasnt wearing any shoes.
So I think before Superbowl weekend begins we should all take a look back on last year and learn from our pitfalls... AKA no touchdown shots and kitchen crying.
Woke up naked wearing mismatched earrings. Didn't even make it to the bar.
...i'd have to set their sheets on fire.
javelin tossed one of my crutches in to the mosh pit at the concert, hit some dude in the temple hahah fuck him he sucks
dude, we need a reunion soon, my vagina needs a deep massage. The kitty is ready to play
Model at car show < day drinking with your favorite sister. Get your head in the fucking game Christopher.
Only three months past my 21st and I'm done. So many life lessons in so little time.
.As long as you're some how patriotic with your sexual escapades, I can support it.
and then she sorta stared at me like "holy shit" and I looked down and my dog was licking her ass
Ruff night.
I just made the same noise looking at my salami sandwich as I do hooking up with you.
Idk if I want to put a bra on
Randomize
