found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
My mom caught just caught me jerking off...in her room.
FYI: if you have sex in your room with the light on, we can totally see your shadows from the parking lot
Your boyfriend has good rhythm though.
I can only be a whore so many days outta the week.
Samesies
wow, so sex, not that great its like masturbating with a warm towelette, like the kind you get at a japanese restaurant
i just burped and it tasted like condom. please tell me i wasn't lame and made that guy wear one for a bj last night.
Just saw a woman in a hospital gown with a Steelers jersey on top smoking a cigarette while hooked up to an IV outside of the hospital. I love Pittsburgh.
He told me to fuck off at some point in the night. I think it was right before he jumped out of a moving car trying to get to another bar and made Abby cry.
He's def the type to chop us into bits whilst screaming "NAPA BITCH". AKA my type
He told me the hickey on the side if his neck was actually a "bruise" from hitting a bird on his motorcycle. I'm not sure what's more impressive, the fact people believed him due to the size of the mark or the fact you gave it to him.
No, supporting your unemployed boyfriend IS NOT what credit cards are for.
How's my sex life is me mastubating next to her dog. that's how it's going.
I told the emergency room nurse I didn't want to stop and ruin the moment. She said safewords are there for a reason. Super condescending. Got her number though.
Turns out it's a fake number.
Do exhausted, barely concealed hand jobs count as joining the mile high club?
His eyefucking isn't even normal eyefucking; it's eye anal.
Randomize
