I'll forget this but out at 4am with a lesbian model at lil waynes bday party for the record
I wasted some perfectly good semen on her
Absence makes the cock grow harder.
I want something that's relevant to him banging her right after I did. Like "runner-up"
found a cell phone. in the freezer. wrapped in bologna. explain?
Just had to hide the fact that I'm not wearing underwear from my 7 year old niece.
It sounds like drunken magic sprinkled w narcotics
She said she wanted you to slurp her vagina like a spaghetti noodle.
im buying my prof a giftcard to the state store bc he talked ab crying into a glass of tequila so he deserves it
I just blew thrown up hashbrowns out my nose. That's the level of this hangover.
My dad told me I would need to be my mom's DD tonight. So, that's how my Easter weekend is going down.
Well, I sent nudes with an Elmo t shirt on the floor... so there's that.
You know I was thinking and I've never seen a penis in a whirlpool before
We ended the night eating peanutbutter with our hands and smoking cigarettes in the house at 4am. Fucking Everclear, man.
Come over. Bring drugs. My sister is making cookies. She took Valium. They should be badass cookies.
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