Mom and Dad are dead. Trust fund
I'm walking behind a man wearing a womans shirt, heels, mens pants and a baseball hat
it wasnt like "sexy" or whatever. like...she was smiling just standing there butt ass naked
tasteful.
Just saw the first guy i ever slept with in drag. I can hear my grandfather saying "i knew she was a lesbian" somewhere
Motor boating, judging by the amount of lipstick I found I would say between 6 to 8 times
Like reprimanding the wall for "sneaking up on me" drunk
we are both sitting on my bed desperately refreshing the order tracking page for dominos.
Don't worry I drank 7 more beers & brought home a guy that bit me at the bar.
What's more awkward than your little brother in law screaming, "I SAW YOUR TITTIES" at the breakfast table?
His step dad chiming in on the jokes.
I just encountered the same creepy guy I showed you, he jumped inside the dumpster screaming.
Tell her this is the Disneyland of penises.It's a magical place everyone should visit once in their life.
I forgot that places existed where drinking on Sunday is frowned upon. It's just so unreasonable.
I just want the relationship Bob and Linda Belcher have- is that too much to ask?!
i think im in europe. pls send help
Makes hanging out interesting when she lights you on fire just to roll ontop of you to 'put you out'.
Randomize
