Obv we're gonna bbm each other in bed
whoever gets the blood i just donated is getting a shit ton of free thc
you need to do more things constructive for your career. like wearing pants more often.
sexting on a treadmill. speed 9.0 beat that slut!
I hate the Packers so much, I wouldn't cheer for them if they were playing al Qaeda.
dont worry, it'll just be a conversation starter like "why did you get that pierced?" or "wow, i got arrested there too"
She asked if my windows were tinted enough for road head.
You were definitely doing something right. You could only see the colored parts of his eyes a couple of times. I was pretty sure he was dead at some point.
I just tried to text you by typing "whoa" into my contacts.
We need to put it on a rope attached to the bong, so it can't be dropped. Apparently, you need a stem safety leash.
The amount of knuckle children I've had to the Farrah Abraham sex tape is disturbing and impressive
Had a burrito last night in your honor
That's the nicest thing you've ever done
I told him to come over when I realized that I did have time for a quick booty call before church.
I made a White Russian but saw how early it was and decided to substitute it for milk in my lucky charms. This is what it means to be an adult.
I dont remember you getting a condom thrown at you. I think I had a concusion
Randomize
