I'm gonna do things to you that will make the neighbors want to move.
ohhhh fuckk. chicks a dude.
So I was just looking through the calendar on my phone seeing what day new years was on & on dec 31st at 9am it says "nude champagne toast". Guess we have to do it.
and ill be dreaming of you. not in a creepy way, but in an inappropriate way
Dude, smoked out of a pumpkin tonight. I like Halloween more now
Happiness for him is a different happiness than you can supply cuz you have life standards, morals and goals that dont include the bar or beer everynight.
Her desktop wallpaper is a collage of penises she fucked.
i can't invite random hot hobos into my aunt's house.
He fucks like those drill things that you see when you think of texas
Same I threw up in 3 different cities already today
No, I'm just drunk and was excited cause a hot stranger bought me tacos.
If I send you a picture of a dick will you give me your honest reaction?
Our first time hooking up was on New Years and we've managed to hook up every holiday since, I'm hoping this lasts until 2016 just to fulfill my American Holiday sex fantasy I never knew I had
Last night was like blooper reel sex. He dropped me!!
I'm really stressed out right now.
I think you're confusing "stressed" and "sober".
Randomize
