i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
saw my dad's penis on the x-ray last night. at least his hip wasn't broken
He was crying to my sister about feeling like a bad person. Then he groped my breasts.
I fucked my boyfriend 15 minutes before my pap test. My gyno probably thinks I hate her.
i don't even want to say how many boners i've caused this week
I knew it was gonna be weird when she opened the condom with scissors
You may have graduated college on time, but my 6th year ass gets to see awesome tits every day just for showing up.
so gross sitting on a warm chair at a restaurant..you just know a fat person was sitting there shoveling food into their face for hours.
After i finished him. He goes "youre a champion"... Then whispers "forever"
may or may not have figured out a way to make my mom a drug mule to bring me ecstasy...
Dick sucking on arrival? or would you like to cash that in later?
Did you high five my face last night?
Yes. Yes I did.
Why was I drunk tweeting incorrect Beyonce lyrics last night?
do you remember yelling out "insecurity makes my pussy dry!" unnecessarily loud at the bar?
I was just in the bathroom and some guy yelled all hail the king... i cant go anywhere without getting recognized anymore.
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