So I don't think its herpes anymore. Could be a sign of diabetes though. Is it bad that I consider getting diabetes 'dodging a bullet'?
He's a good guy, we stopped by his old church.
And you didn't burst into flames?
I don't understand why everytime I fuck his bestfriend he seems more interested in me...
Tell me why I'm at Target and this entire Spanish family is crowding around the condoms questioning which ones they should get
Somebody left a mini pitcher in the bathroom. Think its safe?
We're discussing which museums we should go to when we shroom. How ill would Picasso be?
I'm just planning on experiencing Disney as adult style as it gets. Drinking bloody mary's at dawn and telling all the kids waiting in lines how badly their future sucks and that Santa isn't real.
My god this is going to ruin whatever Vegas left of our souls...
Grandpa got a dui while riding a horse. This is what I need to live up to.
Her boobs felt like beanie babies from heaven
I like making it seem like it's at least a little bit difficult to hook up with me
Worst walk of shame man. They had a fire drill at 7am, had to walk out of her all girl dorm wearing my Everday I'm Hustling sweater
It will be interesting
Isn't that your life's motto?
She moved all of her stuff out while we were gone. Shit in the toilet, and didn’t flush. So yeah it went well.
I'm in the recliner and i have a bottle of wine wedged in my cleavage, drinking from a straw. Clever and classy or pathetic and sloppy?
Randomize
