This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
is it a bad thing if he can only get off when i start talking like one of the girls from Jersey Shore??
She's like the little sister I never had ... except for the fact we're having sex.
my fake id says im a 34 yr old russian lady ... how is this working
besides i was ending his dry spell. it's written in the bible that jesus likes that right?
I've never felt so epic in my entire life as I do right now, my bare testicles staring down the ocean itself
So apparently using the emergency exit of the bar as a bathroom is frowned upon in this establishment...
So this tall girl jumped in our cab and I was like hey I have pics of u on my phone. It wasn't creepy at all
Come now. I'm bloody but I'll give you the best fuck of your life.
I think I blacked out after I decided drinking alone on the trailered jetskis was a good idea
Getting free blow from a total stranger, who asked permission to stroke my eyebrows, was the highlight of my evening out. Also, I have a new cuddle dealer.
idk how I feel so profoundly understood by someone whose latest tweet is "labia majora's mask." but I do.
When you leave ur sleepover boy on ur front porch waiting for a cab bc work
Currently looking up Winnie-the-Pooh porn.
you have 10 seconds to explain why the toilet is full of bread or its ALL GOING ON YOUR BED.
Randomize
