It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
I'm pregaming with America's Best Dance Crew.
Do a shot everytime Lil' Mama mispronounces a word.
season finale of lost and an oz of weed. tonight my mind is going to be blown.
can you explain how you are here for one night and now my kitchen table is in 11 pieces..
I sat on his lap and we shared a beer. I feel like that's an invitation to his dick.
A very small part of me wants you to appreciate me for more than just my breasts. But the rest of me is breasts.
It's like being the dunk pilot of a plane full of pornstars and drunkenness.
Not sure why, but I was running back and forth across the road. Cab hit me and gave us a free ride home.
Honestly bro, I can't look at girls you've banged. Its like looking herpes in the face.
Drinking Fireball means never having to say you're sorry. Unless its at you're arraignment.
i got up, ate a McDouble, then went straight back to bed.
You sure know how to make a day worth living.
She pinched my nipples out of nowhere as I was about to come... I think I found god
My life has evolved from screwing randos, ok?
well apparently i sat in the bathroom staring in the toliet at my vomit. it was blue. how was your night?
I consider walking to the bars and dancing my exercise and I buy doubles so my drinks r heavier so that's my arm workout
Randomize