tfor prom could you pick me up wo bottles of champagne and a condom, please?
sometimes i shoot so far i amaze even myself.
Do you ever creep on the girls you have banged and wondered how their walk of shame went?
3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
Sorry I wasn't really responding earlier. I was really fucking high and so into that car chase.
i really wish i had a remote for my computer. its all the way on my bed while im across the hall puking my brains out to enya. not cool.
He sat there and debated the pros and cons of hooking up with me
i think i made a good impression on his friends wen i survived 55 cup beer pong
I brought him to this party even though we're not together anymore because we made a bet on who would have sex first, and it is a sausage fest up in here.
Her roommate texted her and told her that her cat died. Now she's double-fisting bottles of wine while howling and wailing her dead cat's name. Not how I pictured this booty call.
I just banged your sister. Thats what you get for takibg my lunch money in 2 grade, boom, boom fiyyaa powaa
I'm using her two yr old as a arm rest while I attempt to feel her up. Somehow she is allowing it. How this transitions to sex should be interesting.
Can you please come and collect your boss off of my kitchen floor.
You're a Heat fan? You lose any chance blowjob bc of your poor choice.
How do I cancel buying spotify premium for two homeless people?
Randomize
