hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
So I feel really bad about last night...can i give you a blow job and we call it even?
I am so stoned and my professor is handing out candy. I love Halloween.
My grandma put hard boiled eggs on her lasagna. I'm not high enough for this.
I'm drinking Dom Perignon from the bottle with a straw just to piss of some french dude.
Isiahs hammered. And just came in to get his skateboard and said he has to prove something. This can't end well
and then they started calling me 'Shitshow Shandra', which apparently i took as a compliment.
She spent a lot of time to get her cleavage to look that good. It would be rude not to stare. It shows you are paying attention. Chicks dig that.
Help. Me. He just whispered 'prepare yourself', & sprayed hairspray everywheres to make sure the 'air was crisp'
before we even ate breakfast we'd found an eighth of weed in some old purse she never uses. it was gone by lunch
Alright, my brain isn't sure how to properly function on a Wednesday with no hangover and more than 3 hours of sleep.
I am wrecking havoc on the skinny girls by going home with the big one. She is taking me to see her dog now.
My diet has been 80% Fun Dip this week, soooo, no. Not good.
your keys are upstairs on the nightstand or I put them in the hole in the wall
She grinded so hard on my face that I've got rugburn on both eyelids
Randomize
