I just threw up on my dentist
Last night drunk me texted a sure to be hungover me my class schedule and locations for today. I'm like a mom preparing her child for the first day of school
I was on my way at Dorito Smoothie
Alosmot hir two of of mt mailanoxwa
Oh Jesus.
We got a 5L jug of wine for 3 Euro. Italy was a good choice.
Just grabbing my bra from a history teacher's desk in the Humanities building. Maybe I should stop drinking on weeknights
Ummm, my mojito just spilled on 2 essays as I'm grading. Who says high schoolers have all the fun?
Also, nothing screams "don't talk to me because I'm unstable" like walking around eating cookie dough out of the package.
I would like to dedicate my cray behavior this week to my uncontrollable hormones and wine. Both have totally Efff'ed with my life.
Just described you as looking like "a very cute escapee from an Egyptian insane asylum"
I panicked i brought burritos. Funeral burritos
Pulling on my sock literally just took me 5 minutes.. The hangover is real
Blame the bisexuality and move on?
I know its 2 in the morning and everything. But i just straight up yelled "DON'T YOU UNDERSTAND THIS WORLD IS DIFFICULT ENOUGH AS IT IS WITHOUT YOU PULLING THIS BULLSHIT ON ME" to my taco. Because it fell apart on me. I think i might be cracking under this finals pressure.
Remember how slutty I thought she was when we were freshmen?
Yeah! But that was a long time ago. Plus, you use your sluttiness for good!
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